(AD)VENTURE TO THE PEDIATRICIANS OFFICE

Well, today was eventful. I took both the boys to the doctor's office. Caleb for his 3 yo checkup, and Micah for his 4 mo. checkup. Caleb of course chose the dr's office to be the place he was going to act up. When we get there the child is bouncing off the walls. First the nurse (Trish) says, "Caleb can you take off your shoes?" To which Caleb responds "NO!" I of course then place him on the chair removing his shoes, and telling him "you don't say no!" The nurse then says, "Caleb can you come with me and stand on the scale." Caleb responds "brother first". Oh sheesh...so I grab him by the hand and escort him to the scale to stand on it while Josh undresses the baby (thank God he decided he had to come to this visit)!! So Caleb gets weighed all while Trish keeps saying "what a big boy he is to stand on the scale like that." I want to gag...because I already want to kill him. LOL Well, then we go back in the room, , and here comes the blood pressure cuff..."oh it's just going to tickle your arm see??" and Caleb says, NO! I don't like it! . Then Trish asks us to undress Caleb to his pullup well, Caleb hears that and starts yelling, "No No No" like he's getting killed. Josh then grabs him and undresses him while telling him he needs to settle down. Doesn't work of course, but things calm to a dull roar while we wait. I nurse Micah in the room...AND THEN THE DR COMES IN! Well, I button up, give Micah to daddy and prepare for the battle, b/c I can already see how things are going to go... Well, we start with Caleb. "Caleb, let me hear your heart" she says...Caleb says "NO!" So she goes towards him while I hold him fussing...the next thing I hear is my son screaming with all his might ( I swear the WHOLE office had to have heard him) "GET AWAY FROM MY BOOBIES, GET AWAY FROM MY BOOBIES, GET AWAY FROM MY BOOBIES." The doc started laughing and I am sitting there horrified trying to get him to shut the heck up! Finally he stops, and she checks him head to toe. She lets him draw shapes for her on the exam table paper and he likes that. Then it's time to get him dressed and he doesn't want to get dressed! GRRRRRRR... OK so I give Daddy Caleb and now it's Micah's turn. He of course lays there smiling, laughing, and cooing...no problems out of him. Well then it's time for me to ask mommy type questions to the dr. At this time, Caleb decides it's time to start fussing as loudly as possible about his desire to leave. I tell Daddy to take Caleb out, but doc says he has to have hemoglobin checked. Oh great, I say...I told him no shots today. Well this is going to be lovely. Sure enough, when Nurse Trish comes in, she says...who first? I said let's get Caleb over with. He starts hollering "NO NO NO" as she cleans his finger. Screams his butt off BEFORE she sticks him, and AFTER...DURING he's completely silent and observant! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! She puts a bandaid on his finger, which he promptly removes and I throw it away. Fortunately, he's a quick clotter! Then Micah gets 3 shots. HE DID NOT CRY AT ALL...except for the last shot. The first shot, he looked at daddy and laughed. Well, I was pretty sure this was the end of our dramatic visit...but...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO that wasn't to be the case. Nurse Trish hands Caleb a book "from the dr" and he throws it on the floor and says, "NO! I don't want it." I tell nurse Trish she may want to leave the room as I need to discipline my child (she leaves laughing). When she comes back in I say to Caleb, now WHAT DO YOU SAY TO Miss Trish? "Thank you" he says, in a timid voice (b/c I just swatted his behind with the book she gave him). She tells him he's welcome, and I say under my breath..."ungrateful kid." To which she responds, "it's the age hon. I think it's the toddling twos and the terrible threes..." OH WHAT PROFOUND WISDOM TO WALK OUT OF THE OFFICE WITH...IN COMPLETE EMBARRASSMENT ... Good thing this dr is wonderful, and so is her nurse. Else I would hide under a rock and never come out!