It's that time of year again, where we purposefully reflect on the blessings we have. I find it sad every year it seems we have Halloween and then Christmas marketed early and everyone skips Thanksgiving. It's a shame because being thankful and counting our blessings can help us keep a positive attitude, and realize just how truly blessed we are. This year, I decided that I would write about my blessings. This year, I've learned a lot and hope that through this entry, maybe you too will stop to recount all your many blessings.
I am thankful for my wonderful husband of 10 years, who loves me and constantly looks out for his family. He is unselfish and kind, honest, and my hero. This man that God led me too has been a blessing to me, and in many times through his sweet, giving spirit, I've seen God's love through him. We have moments where we argue of course, what couple doesn't? However, my husband is my protector, my lover, and my best friend. I am truly blessed to have found such a man!
I am thankful for both my boys, both C and M. C has such a tender spirit, and is much like his daddy where people are concerned. He loves other children, and his little spirit is crushed when he sees another person hurting. He wants everyone to feel included, he wants to be everyone's friend. He sees the world as a place where he can help and make a difference. M is my youngest, and of course also has a special place in my heart. M is starting to learn how to read and write, and has such enthusiasm for learning. It blesses my heart to see him trying with all his might to do what his big brother does. When he looks at me with his sweet little 4 yr old eyes, and says "mommy I like you," it just melts my heart. I am so blessed to have two beautiful, healthy little boys.
Of course, in addition to my husband and boys, I'm thankful for the usual things. My job, my home, my family, etc etc. However, what I think I'm most thankful for this year is grace. Within the past few months, God has really spoken to me. Am I perfect? No! Far from it. I struggle with my words, pessimism, depression sometimes and all around stress. However, this year I've really learned more about grace. More then just the theological terms I've heard and known all my life. In April (as the previous entry depicts), I was in a car accident that left me terrified. It left me hurt, scared, and thankful that what could have happened, didn't. God spared M and myself, from what could have been so much worse. I still have some physical evidence in my left arm and hand from that accident. However, I'm so thankful for that wreck. God used it to show me my weakness, my mortality and also HIS GRACE. I've always known and learned in church about God's SAVING grace. What I hadn't really identified with this year is how to LIVE by grace. I've always beat myself up about my short comings, my issues, and really felt like I had to clean up my act or God would look on me as less of a Christian. I've realized by beating myself up constantly, berating myself, and trying desperately to do better so God would love me more, was in fact pride. All that achieved was making me feel depressed and useless. When Christ died on that cross for me, He extended grace to me. Grace that cannot be earned, and by my trying to do better to gain God's favor, I was cheapening the gospel. I was actually living by works. I knew you couldn't be saved by works, but here I was unconciously, trying to gain God's favor by trying to earn His grace. It finally dawned on me this year, that this was not biblical. When Christ went to the cross, He died for my sins past, present, and future...every bad thing I've ever done or will do. He CANNOT love me any more or less. Does that mean I'm free to "live it up" and do what I want because it's already forgiven? Absolutely not!! But it is freeing to finally realize in my heart, that God LOVES me in spite of my sin and ugliness, and that my life efforts to do better should be out of gratefulness to God and His grace, not out of obligation or guilt. All the things I learned and knew in my head, finally CLICKED. Grace is so much more then I really understood, and I find myself once again in awe of my wonderful Saviour who loved me so much, loved all of us so much that He would extend such forgiveness to all that would accept it. HOW EXHILERATING! HOW FREEING!! HOW GREAT IS OUR GOD!! That is why I will say without reservation, that THIS Thanksgiving, I'm most thankful for GRACE!
If you are interested in reading the tremendous book that has helped me understand the concept of living by grace so beautifully, I will include the title. Read it with a teachable spirit, and I PROMISE, you will be blessed! The book is Transforming Grace: Living Confidently in God's Unfailing Love. By Gerald Bridges
Please join me in learning to LIVE by grace and the peace that passes all understanding!!
